High-functioning depression: exhausted but getting things done

This describes my life perfectly. The masking takes all my energy. I thought I was just lazy at home.

This phenomenon is often referred to as "high-functioning depression" or dysthymia (Persistent Depressive Disorder). The exhaustion you feel at home is the result of "masking"—using immense cognitive and emotional energy to suppress depressive symptoms in public. This leaves your executive functioning completely depleted by the end of the day. It is crucial to drop the mask in safe spaces and practice radical self-compassion. Consider lowering the barrier for home tasks (e.g., using paper plates, eating pre-prepared healthy meals) to conserve energy while you work through the underlying depression with a professional.